Dad was a proud man, for certain, but that doesn't mean he had any ounce of hubris in him. On the contrary, he kept around himself an air of humility. He was authoritative in his areas of expertise, but he was respectful of the opinions of others. He and Mom taught us kids the importance of humility: don't boast, don't flaunt, don't tease, and never stoop to Schadenfreude.
In the late '90s, when he was in the midst of his retirement from the shop, he came to visit me in Seattle on a solo trip. I think it was one of the few times that he appreciated my distance away from home, as he was looking for a bit of distance to gain some perspective into the next chapter in his life. Although he liked the idea in theory, having retirement right in front of him was a bit of a challenge. He was a man who always needed something to do, something to fix, something to build, something to nurture. He wasn't sure how he'd find those things in retirement. When we'd first talked about his retirement a number of years earlier, he described himself as the "old Polack who keels over one day while running the tablesaw." Seeing that this probably wouldn't be the case for him, he was looking for other options.
It was a good visit over a long weekend (I took a vacation day from work and he was concerned, "are you sure this is okay with your boss?"). We ate, drank, and talked...a lot, about our dreams, fears, concerns, hopes. One evening, we had drinks and dinner at the 5-Spot and walked back up to my apartment. It was a fair evening, so we sat in the backyard and looked at the city's lights down the hill from us. He brought up the subject of what to do with his time now that he was retired. I asked him, "What do you want to do?"
"I don't know," he said, "I just feel like I need to accomplish something with my life."
I could hardly believe what I'd heard. I reminded him that he earned multiple degrees, ran a number of successful business, traveled internationally for both business and pleasure, and, besides all those accomplishments, he raised a great family. "Dad, if I can claim one-tenth of the accomplishments you've had by the time I retire, I'd consider myself rather successful."
He looked at me and squinted a little, "Huh. You think so?"
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A site dedicated to the memory of John Paul Ruszel.
About Dad
John Ruszel was, at different times in his life, a steelworker, a salesman, a chemist, an owner of a chain of delicatessens, the founding partner of a woodworking shop, and a small business entrepreneur. He had an undergraduate degree in chemistry and an MBA. He worked as a business liaison counseling business executives in Poland, Russia, and countless local shopkeepers. Of all of his life's achievements, he'd probably say his greatest and most important was his marriage to Margaret, his wife of 52 years, the seven children they'd raised and their thirteen grandchildren.
Contributors
Interested in Contributing?
It'd be great to have more authors to this site—I'd like to keep it as open and collaborative as possible. If you'd like to contribute your own posts, please email me and I'll add you on as an author. -t
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